The Windsors are versatile in the art of autodestruction, and their adventures would make a good novel, and maybe even a good column, if we weren't so familiar with their creepy stories. But Charles takes the prize when it comes to sustained, lifelong loserdom. He's had neither the courage to abandon his ceremonial obligations nor to embrace them, and his bottomless self-pity has made him an international laughingstock. Brown almost redeems herself when she quotes from a recent 60 Minutesepisode in which Charles talks about his detractors and his accomplishments.
"I only hope that when I'm dead and gone, they might appreciate it a little bit more," he said.
If Charles promises to hasten the day, I'll be happy to grant him his graveyard wish.
Addendum, Nov. 4: On the long shot that you haven't had enough on the "royals," the Post returns today with three more stories about the clothes Camilla wore, the riff-raff who eyeballed Chuck and Cam, and one about—oh, hell, you figure it out.
Disclosure: The Washington Post Co., which owns both the Washington Post and Slate, is controlled by the royal Graham Family. Send your favorite Windsor story to firstname.lastname@example.org. (E-mail may be quoted by name unless the writer stipulates otherwise.)
Correction: Nov. 4, 2005: The original version of this article gave the incorrect title to the Sex Pistols song about Elizabeth II. The copy has been changed.