"Turn Your Bedroom From Skank to Swank in Five Easy Steps."—Gary Drevitch
"Destiny's Child Works It in the Bathroom."—Julie Carwile
"Decoupage Those Empty 40s!"—Carrie Schadle
"Puff Daddy Shows Off His Nasty Pad. (And We're Not Kidding. You'd Think He Could Afford Maid Service.)"—Steven Davis
"Def, Dope, and Fly—Retro '80s Design Tips From Grandmaster Melle Mel & the Furious Five."—Andrew Puzzio
"Eminem's Famous M&M 'Fighting Hostility' Bar Cookies."—Julie Carwile
"Turn Your Old Thongs Into an Unforgettable Thanksgiving Centerpiece!"—Gary Drevitch
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(Because of complicated technical problems—i.e., I did something truly boneheaded—some submissions to this extra were lost. Fortunately, the mishap occurred in the passive voice to obscure the degree of my responsibility, i.e., 100 percent. Unfortunately, they were undoubtedly the funniest answers ever, not just today but in the history of the quiz. I'm sorry.—Ed.)
Too Much News Extra Credit Extra
Three questions that almost made the cut:
TODAY IN SLATE
Black people’s disdain for “proper English” and academic achievement is a myth.
Hong Kong’s Protesters Are Ridiculously Polite. That’s What Scares Beijing So Much.
The One Fact About Ebola That Should Calm You: It Spreads Slowly
A Jaw-Dropping Political Ad Aimed at Young Women, Apparently
How Even an Old Hipster Can Age Gracefully
On their new albums, Leonard Cohen, Robert Plant, and Loudon Wainwright III show three ways.