No. 457: "Hair Force"

Testing your knowledge of what happened this week
July 25 2000 3:00 AM

No. 457: "Hair Force"

(Continued from Page 2)

Answers

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  1. Real plan but just canceled. "Many people would think it's a little bit intrusive," said ABC promo guy Alan Cohen. "We've also shut down the plan to have John Stossel sneak up on everyone in Chicago and pat them on the ass," he did not add.
  2. In effect now, perhaps accounting for popularity of Regis Philbin in the coveted teen baboon demographic.
  3. Utter fabrication.
  4. Utter waste of money, but true.
  5. Just a crazy dream.
  6. Ineffectual but true. On the other hand, it's reassuring to know that millions of people with minty fresh breath are not watching ABC.
  7. Frightening but true. And it's reassuring to know that millions of people startled into peeing on their own shoes are not watching ABC.

ABC You Later Ongoing Extra

"If you had Norm MacDonald call you and remind you his show was on, we thought it would be fun, the type of thing people usually tell their friends about," said a hopelessly deluded Alan Cohen, the ABC promo guy who reluctantly shut down this benighted venture. But how will ABC promote its programs now? Participants are invited to offer suggestions. Best responses to run Friday.

Common Denominator

Nobody misses the British.

Randy Cohen used to write Slate's "News Quiz." His most recent book—oh, like you don't know.