News Quiz

No. 380: “Rollin’ and Tumblin’ ‘

“Twisting … nose rocking … tumbling, spinning … continuous roll … corkscrewing and inverted”–all words used by observers of one of last week’s news events. What had they just seen? (Question courtesy of Michele Siegel.) 

Send your answer by noon ET Tuesday to newsquiz@slate.com.

Thursday’s Question (No. 379)–“Sign Out”:

More than 20,000 marchers took to the streets of Vienna Wednesday. What was on the protest signs they carried?

“Don’t blame me: I voted for Waldheim!”–Gary Drevitch

“Ruckhol Elian nach Kuba. Why can’t the Austrians mind their own business?”–Daniel “Gotta Love These Internet Translation Engines” Kahn (Daniel Radosh, Marshall Efron, Juris Odins, and Shany Mor had similar answers.)

“Plea to ABC executives for more Millionaire shows.”–Arthur T.S. Jackson

“We won’t follow Lipizzaners in Annual Anti-Semitism Parade!”–Steven Davis

“Let us vote for McCain!”–Marshall Efron (similarly, Jonathan E. Snow)

Click for more answers.

Randy’s Wrap-Up

The sausage–beloved answer of quiz participants–figures in one of the few metaphors promoting the benign uses of ignorance: Never watch sausages being made. Knowledge of the horrifying process would thwart your ability to enjoy its pleasurable results. Similarly, never observe what goes on in a restaurant kitchen. This is doubly true if they’re cooking sausages in there, especially if the chef is an illegal immigrant paid half the minimum wage for an 80-hour week, thereby provoking him to spit in your horrible side dish, work insanely hard, become a citizen, get elected to Congress, and pass a new Pure Food and Restaurant Labor Law through a legislative process as nauseating as whatever the hell they do to make pig lips crammed into a piece of intestine so tasty. And that is how a bill becomes a delicious part of my well-balanced breakfast. (This in no way should be construed as recommending having sex with the lights off, unless you are sleeping with a member of Congress.) This wrap-up has been paid for the National Pork Council.

You Can Run but You Can’t Haider Answer

Demonstrators denounced the proposed inclusion of members of Jorg Haider’s Freedom Party in any government coalition, waving banners that included, “From Brussels to Vienna: No Government With Racists.” Other signs called Haider a “pop fascist” and “pseudo-Christian.” A few marchers carried pictures of Che Guevara; many more carried the circle of yellow stars, symbol of the European Union.

Correction

John McCain was not in the Air Force; it was as a Navy pilot that he rained death and misery on the people of Vietnam. And he did not have sex with the still warm body of a great ape he’d slaughtered with his own hands; he won last week’s New Hampshire Republican Presidential primary. Thanks to an alert Gerald Bergen for setting me straight.

Herb Terns’ Bullying Slogan Ongoing Extra

I came across a confusing slogan from the Israeli Ministry of Tourism: “No one belongs here more than you!” I’m not sure what this means, but it seems they’re billing Israel as some kind of no man’s land, much like Las Vegas. Perhaps quiz participants can devise something less punitive, less belligerent, less compulsory-sounding for the Ministry of Tourism.

Find inspiration at www.goisrael.com.

Best new slogans for the Israeli Ministry of Tourism to run Thursday.

Common Denominator

Sausages and anti-Semitism.