Sunday’s contests determined that the Tennessee Titans will face the St. Louis Rams in Super Bowl XXXIV. Inevitably the mayors of Nashville and St. Louis will wager well-known local products on the big game. What’s their bet? (Question courtesy of Jon Delfin.)
Send your answer by noon ET Tuesday to newsquiz@slate.com.
Thursday’s Question (No. 371)– “Measured Response”:
Eight feet, pondered Justice Stephen Breyer. What about 3 feet? asked Chief Justice William Rehnquist. Two inches, or even an eighth of an inch, considered Justice Antonin Scalia. At Wednesday’s Supreme Court session, the justices were quite concerned with the size of something. What?
“The distance from a homeless shelter that a family of four must remain if both parents have been unemployed for more than six days.”—Daniel Kahn (Larry Amoros had a similar answer.)
“They were pondering the ideal distance from Pat Buchanan a person should be when that person spits on him.”—Marshall Efron
“How wide a jail cell has to be before it constitutes cruel and unusual punishment.”—Francis Heaney
“The space allotted for Abe Rosenthal’s Daily News column.”—Matt Sullivan
“Could you please not stand so close to me when you ask that? And get out of my way. I’m deliverin’ PIZZA for chrissake.”—Dr. Jonathan E. Snow
Click for more answers.
Randy’s Wrap-Up
Cruel, dim, and out of touch with American life—no, not the evil bastards who killed Charles Schulz—the U. S. Supreme Court, at least that’s how they look to quiz participants. Scorn for the court has been a consistent theme of quiz responses; that’s one of the things I’ve learned as we near the second anniversary of the quiz. (Yes, there will be a party; yes, gifts are appropriate; and yes, my clothing sizes and preferences in porcelain figurines [drunken belligerent clowns] will be posted as soon as those lovable bumblers at Shining Path get the site up and working.) A second thing I’ve learned is that Schulz is actually alive; apparently they just beat him so badly that he can no longer draw. And a third observation is that, judging by the higher than usual number of responses, quiz participants love an invitation to a penis joke. So here’s a gift for you, a question I didn’t run today. In 1949, Harry Truman did it 88 times; in 1997, Bill Clinton did it 545 times. What? (See below.)
If You Can’t Harass From 8 Feet You Don’t Deserve To Be Called a Religious Fanatic Answer
As I understand the law, the court was considering how big a distance might be maintained between a woman going to the doctor and a shrieking Christian wishing to intimidate her.
Hill vs. Colorado (No. 98-1856) challenges a 1993 law establishing a 100-foot zone around the entrance to any health-care facility. Within that zone, people may not, without consent, approach anyone within 8 feet to engage in “oral protest, education, or counseling” on a public sidewalk.
Anti-abortion activists say this abridges free speech. Colorado, supported by 18 other states and the Clinton administration, says that at 8 feet one can speak in a normal tone of voice and be clearly heard, and thus the law does nothing to curb “uninhibited debate on all topics.” It merely allows a woman to go to the doctor without someone screaming in her face.
The ACLU has filed a brief on the plaintiff’s behalf.
Matthew Singer’s Amtrak Slogan Ongoing Extra
The commuter train I ride from Baltimore to Washington each day, MARC, is having a contest.
“Amtrak and MARC take the safety of our passengers very seriously. Almost every day a customer is injured while boarding or getting off of a train. They slip on the stairs or fall between the gap between the train and the platform, etc., etc. Amtrak and its Commuter Division try very hard to raise Safety awareness of its Passengers by using simple, short Safety Slogans such as ‘Walk, Don’t Run,’ ‘Watch the Gap’ or ‘Stay Alert, Stay Alive,’ etc., etc. Amtrak would like our Commuter Customers to help us find some new slogans.”
I’d like News Quiz participants to provide those slogans.
Reponses will run Thursday and be forwarded to Amtrak for a shot at the big prize, a one-month free pass on the MARC.
Answer to Bonus Penis Joke Question
Sent goons over to beat the hell out of Charles Schulz.
Actual Answer to Bonus Penis Joke Question
Gave speeches.
Common Denominator
Thomas hearings nostalgia.
