Federal attorneys in the Eastern District of New York arrested and indicted seven people in a case that touched on Holland, Hasidim, and squirrels. What's the connection?
Send your answer by noon ET Thursday to email@example.com.
Tuesday's Question (No. 278)--"Interest Rate":
Fill in the blank as Carleton S. Fiorina, 44, the newly announced CEO of the $50 billion Hewlett-Packard company, meets the press: "My ________ is interesting but really not the subject of the story here."
"Ability to play soccer."--Jennifer"Damned One-Note Media!" Miller
"Inability to distinguish 'profits' from 'losses.' "--Paul Tullis
"Dinner with Andre."--Erich Van Dussen
"Sexual discrimination lawsuit against Hewlett-Packard."--Richard Nikonovich-Kahn
"Nike Inner Actives sports bra, which will go on sale at major sporting goods retailers Monday, July 26, with a suggested retail price of $40."--Doug Welty (Daniel Radosh and Kate Wing had similar answers.)
Click for more answers.
But of course it's not for Carleton Fiorina to say what the subject of the story is; that's the job of the reporter. Or, if the reporter works for Vanity Fair, of the celebrity's press agent. You'll find your experience with the newspapers less frustrating if you accept the idea that the reporter is there to tell not your story but his or hers. It is, no doubt, irritating to be misquoted, but at least you retain the moral high ground and a sense of yourself as wise and well-spoken, albeit misunderstood. What's completely intolerable is to be accurately quoted and seen--even by yourself--to be no better than you actually are. It is a deeply demoralizing experience for anyone who lacks adequate powers of self-deception and photo approval.
Egalitarian Utopia Answer
"My gender is interesting but really not the subject of the story here."
"I hope that we are at a point that everyone has figured out that there is not a glass ceiling," Fiorina added. Well, maybe. But, while she is undoubtedly a terrifically capable and successful executive, her new job will make her the only woman ever to head a company included in the Dow Jones industrial average and one of only three to run a company listed on the S&P 500.
The former president of the $20 billion global service provider division of Lucent Technologies, Fiorina is a surprising choice in other ways, too. She is young, she is an outsider in a company that has traditionally found its leaders in-house, she brings a marketing and sales background to the engineering culture of H-P, and her first name seems utterly unrelated to her surname.
"Carly was quite simply the best person to lead H-P into the next century," said Lewis Platt, the company's current chief. "And to look fabulous doing it," he did not add.
Brooke Saucier's Pom-Pom-Shaking Follow-Up
How ironic. I was a cheerleader in high school, and Jeff Webb was the announcer on ESPN as we won the national championship in 1987.
Goooooooooooooo, News Quiz!!
Good News--Or Not, Depending--Extra
"An investigation into the size of male sex organs reveals that homosexuals are generally better endowed than heterosexuals. ... Researchers say they surveyed data gathered on 5,172 men and found penis sizes to be larger in homosexuals than heterosexuals based on five measurement standards. ... Researchers say an earlier study also shows that homosexuals differ, on average, from heterosexuals in genital size. A survey of 126 homosexual men had larger penises on the average than a similar group of 86 heterosexuals."--from The List, a service of Wired Strategies. Subscribe free by e-mailing join-THELIST@wiredstrategies.com. (Thanks to Katha Pollitt.)
Ongoing Domain Name Extra
GlobalEconomy.com is already registered by SatelliteTV.
Dollar-A-Day.com is already registered by Execulink Internet Services. FiftyCents-A-Day.com is available.
Participants are invited to submit a similar set (a pair will do)--a domain name that is already taken along with an amusing and available alternative.
You can check the availability of domain names at http://www.eHost.com/domain_reg/index.html.
Replies due by noon ET Thursday.
Ambiguous name, attractive ass.