Dino Rider
Technically, not a fruit but a member of the squirrel family.
"Alternatives to geriatric health care in the Republicans' new budget."--Danny Franklin
"Things I can do better than that kid on Life Goes On. On the other hand, he can act and counts Kellie Martin, that hot new chick on E.R., among his friends."--Jon Hotchkiss
"Activities at Mayor Giuliani's new methadone-free detox camp: SPIELEN MACHT FREI."--Alfa-Betty Olsen and Marshall Efron
"Strom Thurmond's to-do list."--Doug Strauss
"Other youthful indiscretions of Henry Hyde."--Tom Hewson
"Clinton's post-presidential options."--Colleen Werthmann
"Top four activities for locked-out NBA players."--Christopher Clark
"Daily schedule of events for octogenarians on death row waiting for their next stay of execution."--Gene Cluster
"New activities for those poker-playing dogs--part of a bold marketing strategy to update their brand identity and increase their appeal to a new generation of velvet-wall-hanging buyers."--Daniel Radosh
"The four remaining academic disciplines in which America can whup Asia's ass."--Tim Carvell
"What the president now does on Saturdays between 3:14 p.m. and 4:02 p.m. standing up in the side chamber of the Oval Office."--Jack Hitt
"Top four activities Hillary assumed Monica Lewinsky was engaged in with the president."--Andrew Milner (Barry Tobias had a similar answer.)
"Activities suggested to Ken Starr to help him get his mind off the grueling job of penning a best seller."--Judith Spencer
"Job duties Lewinsky listed on the résumé she submitted to Revlon."--Louis Rice
"Freshman curriculum at universities where multiculturalism prevails."--David Finkle
"New York board of regents' new, realistic curriculum."--Beth Sherman
"Curriculum for the 'accelerated program' in New York City public schools, which allows kids to graduate directly to prison after fourth-grade."--Fred Graver
"B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O, and Bingo was his name-o! I'm sorry, what was the question?"--Tim Carvell
"What Thurmond and his ass are doing as his staff works feverishly to replace the Bill of Rights with the Ten Commandments."--Steve Reiness
"Hubbledy, hubbledy, hubbledy, hubbledy, hubbledy, News Quiz. Hubbledy, hubbledy."--Jim "At Least I Got the Last Answer" O'Grady
Randy Cohen used to write Slate's "News Quiz." His most recent book—oh, like you don't know.