Tired of searching alone? Google's Hot Trends, an hourly snapshot of the Web's fastest-rising searching terms, is the best place to find what your fellow searchers are dying to learn: who's having sex with whom, who's in legal trouble, who's dead, and who's been traded to the Yankees (and, in the winter, where kids are hoping for a snow day).
Here at Slate, we keep a close eye on which news events pop up on Google Trends. We got to wondering: What would the ultimate Google Trends mashup look like? Your challenge: Write the most deadpan, objective, AP-style news item using as many simultaneous Google Trends as you can. If you can figure out a way to combine the latest celebrity couple and the most recent political scandal believably, all the better. Just visit the "Hot Trends" page any time this week and get started. There's a 600-word limit, so use those adjectives sparingly. And don't forget to let us know how many keywords you worked into your story.
Entries must be received by Monday, Feb. 1, at 5 p.m. ET.
This contest is now closed. Read the results here.