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George Allen has spent all summer with his foot in his mouth. On Sunday, Salon reported that a handful of the Virginia senator's former football teammates claim he repeatedly used the word nigger. The New York Times wrote on Tuesday that two of Allen's former acquaintances recall that he said the word. Allen has denied the allegations. "The story and his comments and assertions in there are completely false," he told the Associated Press. "I don't remember ever using that word and it is absolutely false that that was ever part of my vocabulary."

Last week, Allen accused a reporter who asked about his mother's Jewish background of "making aspersions about people." He later remarked that his newfound Semitic heritage hadn't brought about any dramatic changes: "I still had a ham sandwich for lunch." Allen also drew attention over the summer when he referred to one of his opponents' campaign volunteers as a macaca—an ethnic slur in some North African countries. What was his excuse this time? "I don't know what it means."

We know what you're thinking: When's George Allen going to insult me? That's where Slate's George Allen Insult Generator comes in. Are you black? Fat? A stamp collector? Sen. Allen's got an insult—and a rationalization—waiting for you.