The Senate judiciary committee explains its votes in haiku form.

The law, lawyers, and the court.
July 28 2009 4:21 PM

306 Syllables on Sotomayor

The Senate judiciary committee explains its votes in haiku form.

It's a good thing there were yet more speeches today at the Senate judiciary committee's hearing on Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor. God knows, it's been a well-kept secret how each senator was poised to vote. The final tally was 13-6 in support of Sotomayor, although there were only 18 speeches (Jon Kyl, R-Ariz., did not speak). For those who missed the proceedings, the following are summaries of each of the senators' speeches as offered this morning—in haiku form.

Patrick Leahy, D-Vt.
Republicans call
Her failure to make new law
"Activism." Bah!

Dahlia Lithwick Dahlia Lithwick

Dahlia Lithwick writes about the courts and the law for Slate. Follow her on Twitter.

Jeff Sessions, R-Ala.
A wise Latina
Would set aside her bias
She just can't do it

Herb Kohl, D-Wis.
She just won't answer
This is not conversation
I vote to confirm

Advertisement

Orrin Hatch, R-Utah
Her speeches and words
Show a disturbing approach
She's never resolved

DianneFeinstein, D-Calif.
What Sonia has done
Is so very impressive
So I am impressed

Chuck Grassley, R-Iowa
Pit in my stomach
Ricci, Maloney, Didden
Too biased to judge

Russell Feingold, D-Wis.
Theater this is
She dodged all of our questions
But still I vote yea

Lindsey Graham, R-S.C.
Law's a quiet place
Where unpopular may hope
Young Latinas dream

Charles E. Schumer, D-N.Y.
Many opinions
Yet they look outside record
Shout  outside mainstream

John Cornyn, R-Texas
We now all agree
Judges channel the Framers
Empathy is toast

Dick Durbin, D-Ill.
Guys 'n' gals differ
It's not that one is biased
We just come that way

Tom Coburn, R-Okla.
She wouldn't defend
The wise Latina comment
So I must vote no

Ben Cardin, D-Md.
Wise Latina thing
It was raised seventeen times
I think she gets it

Sheldon Whitehouse, D-R.I.
I cannot find fault
With empathy in judges
Courts are the last stand

Amy Klobuchar, D-Minn.
A prosecutor
Badass on white collar crime
Tough chick. Just like me.

Edward Kaufman, D-Del.
Financial markets—
Let me say it one more time:
Financial markets

Arlen Specter, D-Pa.
Ethnic pride is good
But this is not me crying
It's just the chemo

Al Franken, D-Minn.
Roberts Court trashes
Protections for you and me
Now that's activist!

.

TODAY IN SLATE

Doublex

Crying Rape

False rape accusations exist, and they are a serious problem.

Scotland Is Just the Beginning. Expect More Political Earthquakes in Europe.

I Bought the Huge iPhone. I’m Already Thinking of Returning It.

The Music Industry Is Ignoring Some of the Best Black Women Singing R&B

How Will You Carry Around Your Huge New iPhone? Apple Pants!

Medical Examiner

The Most Terrifying Thing About Ebola 

The disease threatens humanity by preying on humanity.

Television

The Other Huxtable Effect

Thirty years ago, The Cosby Show gave us one of TV’s great feminists.

Lifetime Didn’t Find the Steubenville Rape Case Dramatic Enough. So They Added a Little Self-Immolation.

No, New York Times, Shonda Rhimes Is Not an “Angry Black Woman” 

Brow Beat
Sept. 19 2014 1:39 PM Shonda Rhimes Is Not an “Angry Black Woman,” New York Times. Neither Are Her Characters.
Behold
Sept. 19 2014 1:11 PM An Up-Close Look at the U.S.–Mexico Border
  News & Politics
Politics
Sept. 19 2014 6:22 PM Blacks Don’t Have a Corporal Punishment Problem Americans do. But when blacks exhibit the same behaviors as others, it becomes part of a greater black pathology. 
  Business
Moneybox
Sept. 19 2014 6:35 PM Pabst Blue Ribbon is Being Sold to the Russians, Was So Over Anyway
  Life
Inside Higher Ed
Sept. 19 2014 1:34 PM Empty Seats, Fewer Donors? College football isn’t attracting the audience it used to.
  Double X
The XX Factor
Sept. 19 2014 4:58 PM Steubenville Gets the Lifetime Treatment (And a Cheerleader Erupts Into Flames)
  Slate Plus
Slate Picks
Sept. 19 2014 12:00 PM What Happened at Slate This Week? The Slatest editor tells us to read well-informed skepticism, media criticism, and more.
  Arts
Brow Beat
Sept. 19 2014 4:48 PM You Should Be Listening to Sbtrkt
  Technology
Future Tense
Sept. 19 2014 6:31 PM The One Big Problem With the Enormous New iPhone
  Health & Science
Medical Examiner
Sept. 19 2014 5:09 PM Did America Get Fat by Drinking Diet Soda?   A high-profile study points the finger at artificial sweeteners.
  Sports
Sports Nut
Sept. 18 2014 11:42 AM Grandmaster Clash One of the most amazing feats in chess history just happened, and no one noticed.