So, add this to your list of resolutions—put it at the bottom so it's still there when you've given up on all the rest: I will start now to become the octogenarian (nonagenarian if you've got the guts) of my choice. Gradually adjust your gait (curmudgeons stalk, martyrs creep up, etc.), your manner of speaking (grande dames may want to acquire a mild case of Locust Valley lockjaw, roués might pick up a few phrases en français)—and, if your role demands it, start making subtle inquiries about the choice of a plastic surgeon. Good luck, or, as they say in showbiz (which after all is what we're talking about), break a leg! Just be careful not to break your hip.
TODAY IN SLATE
Scalia’s Liberal Streak
The conservative justice’s most brilliant—and surprisingly progressive—moments on the bench.
Colorado Is Ground Zero for the Fight Over Female Voters
There’s a Way to Keep Ex-Cons Out of Prison That Pays for Itself. Why Don’t More States Use It?
The NFL Explains How It Sees “the Role of the Female”
The Music Industry Is Ignoring Some of the Best Black Women Singing R&B
Theo’s Joint and Vanessa’s Whiskey
No sitcom did the “Very Special Episode” as well as The Cosby Show.
The Other Huxtable Effect
Thirty years ago, The Cosby Show gave us one of TV’s great feminists.