Joe Lieberman bows out.

Politics and policy.
Feb. 4 2004 5:40 PM

Joebituary

Joe Lieberman bows out.

Joe No! It's all Joever now
Joe No! It's all Joever now

Say it ain't so, Joe.

William Saletan William Saletan

Will Saletan writes about politics, science, technology, and other stuff for Slate. He’s the author of Bearing Right.

Here's Joe Lieberman on TV, quitting the race.

Advertisement

I have such fond memories of Lieberman's campaign. Actually, it was never the Lieberman campaign. It was the Joe campaign. The Web site was www.joe2004.com. The campaign vehicle was the Joemobile. The blog was www.blogforjoe.com. Why the Joe theme? To identify with the average Joe, I suppose. And maybe because the folks at the Lieberman campaign thought the name Lieberman sounded, well, a bit too Joeish.

Joe was the heir apparent, Al Gore's right-hand man. A bit too right-hand, as it turned out. He started out the race with a presumptive seniority that might have been called, in the parlance of his campaign, PrimoJoeniture. But on the stump, voters found him Joematose. He had trouble rustling up Joenations. Antiwar Democrats in Iowa found his support of the Iraq war Joefensive. He went into a Joesdive. He was Joewhere.

In New Hampshire, however, he sensed a Joepening. All those McCain independents could vote in the state's Joepen primary. Joe set up house there and went to work. The crowds welcomed him with Joevations. He surged in the Joevernights. "Joementum!" crowed his campaign. He was Joevial.

Alas, Joeverconfidence felled him. He finished fifth in New Hampshire and was written off. He was Joast. Joadkill. D-Joe-A.

Yet he refused to bow out. The Joe must go on, he vowed. Critics said he was in Joenial, but he flew south, taking his Joe on the road. He faced down his lengthening odds with a certain Joe de vivre. Where would he break through? Joeklahoma? AriJoena? North DaJoeta? New MexiJoe? The Joe Me state?

Alas, he came up empty tonight. Joe-for-7. Joe-miliation.

Joe revoir, Joe. Joerivederci. Hasta Joe Vista. Somewhere conservative Democrats are laughing, and somewhere McCain independents shout. But there is no Joe in Mudville. Joe Lieberman has struck out.

TODAY IN SLATE

Technocracy

Forget Oculus Rift

This $25 cardboard box turns your phone into an incredibly fun virtual reality experience.

The Congressional Republican Digging Through Scientists’ Grant Proposals

Renée Zellweger's New Face Is Too Real

Sleater-Kinney Was Once America’s Best Rock Band

Can it be again?

Whole Foods Is Desperate for Customers to Feel Warm and Fuzzy Again

The XX Factor

I’m 25. I Have $250.03.

My doctors want me to freeze my eggs.

The XX Factor
Oct. 20 2014 6:17 PM I’m 25. I Have $250.03. My doctors want me to freeze my eggs.
Politics

Smash and Grab

Will competitive Senate contests in Kansas and South Dakota lead to more late-breaking races in future elections?

George Tiller’s Murderer Threatens Another Abortion Provider, Claims Free Speech

These Companies in Japan Are More Than 1,000 Years Old

  News & Politics
The World
Oct. 21 2014 3:13 PM Why Countries Make Human Rights Pledges They Have No Intention of Honoring
  Business
Moneybox
Oct. 21 2014 1:12 PM The Global Millionaires Club Is Booming and Losing Its Exclusivity
  Life
The Vault
Oct. 21 2014 2:23 PM A Data-Packed Map of American Immigration in 1903
  Double X
The XX Factor
Oct. 21 2014 3:03 PM Renée Zellweger's New Face Is Too Real
  Slate Plus
Behind the Scenes
Oct. 21 2014 1:02 PM Where Are Slate Plus Members From? This Weird Cartogram Explains. A weird-looking cartogram of Slate Plus memberships by state.
  Arts
Brow Beat
Oct. 21 2014 1:47 PM The Best Way to Fry an Egg
  Technology
Technology
Oct. 21 2014 10:43 AM Social Networking Didn’t Start at Harvard It really began at a girls’ reform school.
  Health & Science
Climate Desk
Oct. 21 2014 11:53 AM Taking Research for Granted Texas Republican Lamar Smith continues his crusade against independence in science.
  Sports
Sports Nut
Oct. 20 2014 5:09 PM Keepaway, on Three. Ready—Break! On his record-breaking touchdown pass, Peyton Manning couldn’t even leave the celebration to chance.