Goldberg,
Answer to Question No. 1 From Your Last Mail: What do you mean, if I were Jewish, who would I vote for? I’m so down with members of the tribe that I’m practically a Jewish whigger, if you catch my drift. Can’t you use your Zionist connections and get me the equivalent of a papal dispensation or an act of Congress and make me a Jew? I don’t think it matters who anybody votes for in this election because Israel could elect Shecky Greene and the war would come anyway and he’d have to pretend to be Ariel Sharon. If you press me, I guess it makes sense to vote for Sharon because he’s an insaniac of the first order and won’t waste any time on peace processing. Or, in a Nixon-goes-to-China move, he might find a way to force everybody to behave. OK, now who would you vote for?
Answer to Question No. 2 From Your Last Mail: What sort of gun would I carry in Israel? One that fires depleted uranium bullets.
Answer to Question No. 3 From Your Last Mail: What kind of Jewish woman would I go for? Let’s restate the question as what sort of Jewish woman wouldn’t I go for? “Well, West Bank girls are hip, I really dig those Uzis they wear. And Scarsdale chicks, with the way they shop, they really impoverish me when I’m up there. The Midwest scrap-dealers’ daughters really make you feel all right. …” You get the idea.
I’m filing a little later than I’m supposed to, so I’m going to sign off now and let you do the heavy lifting and agenda setting today. But I want to revisit the Wall Street Journal editorial page, so here’s your reading assignment: Charles Murray despairing over youth thug culture. (He’s against it.) And also look at the Washington Post’s Page One story about the latest crisis in the D.C. suburbs: starter mansions going up on tiny lots. (I’m for them.)
By the way, have you ever visited rotten.com? Please don’t.
Love,
Jack
