Strip club hubby, overly friendly teacher, evil in-law, and a date's dirty hands—Dear Prudence advises readers at

Advice on manners and morals.
June 9 2011 7:04 AM

Businessman on the Road to Ruin

My wife doesn't know I visit strip bars and porn theaters while away on business. But that's not cheating, right?

(Continued from Page 1)


Dear Prudie,
For the past several weeks, I've been dating a great new guy. We have a lot of chemistry, and I think there's potential for a long-term relationship. There's just one problem: I've realized that he doesn't wash his hands after using the restroom! My apartment is small, and you can hear everything that's happening in the bathroom from outside; I've never once heard the water running after hearing the toilet flush. I've held his hand after he comes out of the bathroom to check them out, and not once have they felt cold or wet. I'm not a germophobe, but to me this just seems like a basic practice of good hygiene. The rest of his hygiene is fine: He's a great-looking, well-dressed, good-smelling guy. Should I say something? If so, what? It seems like a small thing to end a relationship over, but it's bizarre and distasteful.

—Starting To Get Grossed Out

Dear Starting,
Your boyfriend's not German, is he? If so, maybe he's the source of the E. coli outbreak raging through that country! Let's assume he's neither washing nor sanitizing his hands. You've been with him for several weeks and your health remains sound. So while it should be standard to wash after using the facilities, letting this go until you get to know each other much better is not jeopardizing your health. For the time being, pretend your apartment has thick walls and you just don't know about his hand-washing habits. I think you two need to be much better acquainted before you start improving him. (Let's stipulate we're talking about "number one." Washing after "number two" is absolutely mandatory.) When you're really a comfortable couple, take his hand in yours and tell him he's wonderful, then add, "You know that sign in the bathroom that says, 'Employees must wash hands before returning to work'? That sign also means you."


More Dear Prudence Columns

"Financial Affairs: I want to bequeath money to my mistress in my will. Is that wrong?" Posted March 24, 2011.
"A Fool for Love: My wife is super hot but dumb. How can I make the best of our union?" Posted March 17, 2011.
"I Can't Relate: My estranged half-sister wants to get to know me, but I'm afraid my parents won't approve." Posted March 10, 2011.
"Diamonds Aren't a Girl's Best Friend: My ex is blackmailing me for sex. How can I get out of it?" Posted March 3, 2011.

More Dear Prudence Chat Transcripts

"This Baby Shower Is a Wash: Dear Prudence advises a reader who thinks her brother impregnated his girlfriend to steal her own baby's thunder—in a live chat at" Posted March 21, 2011.
"Teacher Gone Wild: Dear Prudence advises a schoolteacher caught on tape acting a drunken fool—in a live chat at" Posted March 14, 2011.
"Dead Letters at the Office: Prudie counsels an office worker who found love letters while cleaning out the desk of a recently deceased colleague that are not from her widower—and other advice-seekers." Posted March 7, 2011.
"Nightmare Vacation: Prudie counsels a reader who regrets her promise to take an ailing family member to Disneyland—in this week's live chat." Posted Feb. 28, 2011.

Like Prudie on the official Dear Prudence Facebook page and like  Slate on Facebook. Follow us on Twitter.



Meet the New Bosses

How the Republicans would run the Senate.

The Government Is Giving Millions of Dollars in Electric-Car Subsidies to the Wrong Drivers

Scotland Is Just the Beginning. Expect More Political Earthquakes in Europe.

Cheez-Its. Ritz. Triscuits.

Why all cracker names sound alike.

Friends Was the Last Purely Pleasurable Sitcom

The Eye

This Whimsical Driverless Car Imagines Transportation in 2059

Medical Examiner

Did America Get Fat by Drinking Diet Soda?  

A high-profile study points the finger at artificial sweeteners.

The Afghan Town With a Legitimately Good Tourism Pitch

A Futurama Writer on How the Vietnam War Shaped the Series

  News & Politics
Sept. 21 2014 11:34 PM People’s Climate March in Photos Hundreds of thousands of marchers took to the streets of NYC in the largest climate rally in history.
Business Insider
Sept. 20 2014 6:30 AM The Man Making Bill Gates Richer
Sept. 20 2014 7:27 AM How Do Plants Grow Aboard the International Space Station?
  Double X
The XX Factor
Sept. 19 2014 4:58 PM Steubenville Gets the Lifetime Treatment (And a Cheerleader Erupts Into Flames)
  Slate Plus
Tv Club
Sept. 21 2014 1:15 PM The Slate Doctor Who Podcast: Episode 5  A spoiler-filled discussion of "Time Heist."
Sept. 21 2014 9:00 PM Attractive People Being Funny While Doing Amusing and Sometimes Romantic Things Don’t dismiss it. Friends was a truly great show.
Future Tense
Sept. 21 2014 11:38 PM “Welcome to the War of Tomorrow” How Futurama’s writers depicted asymmetrical warfare.
  Health & Science
The Good Word
Sept. 21 2014 11:44 PM Does This Name Make Me Sound High-Fat? Why it just seems so right to call a cracker “Cheez-It.”
Sports Nut
Sept. 18 2014 11:42 AM Grandmaster Clash One of the most amazing feats in chess history just happened, and no one noticed.