Prudie offers advice on matriarchs with salacious secrets, deadly diseases, and pernicious personalities, just in time for Mother's Day.

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Dear Prudie,
I was raised by loving and supportive parents who are both nearing 50. Ours was the house where all my friends wanted to hang out. Until recently, I thought I had as close to perfect parents as possible. Before I left for college last fall, my parents said they had something personal to tell me that they didn't want me to find out by accident. It turns out when my mom was younger, she was a porn star, and pictures of her can still be found on several Web sites. They felt I was old enough to understand and that I should hear it from them. I'm still having trouble with this information. I don't love them any less, but I guess I'm still in shock and denial. I'm so nervous about coming home for the summer, because I still don't have a grip on my feelings, and I'm afraid that I'll do something that will ruin my relationship with my parents.

—Not Star Struck

Dear Not,
I understand that their send-off left you looking at your parents and wondering, Who are these people? But they are the same wonderful, loving parents who raised you and whom all your friends adore. They did a difficult thing that has left you shaken, but I hope as you work through this you don't unnecessarily distance yourself from them. Imagine the turmoil they've been under in the last few years, wondering if you'd stumble on this yourself, whether they should tell you, and how. Imagine their distress, since you are all so close, to see how painful the news has been to you. What you need to do is talk to your parents, just as you always have. You won't ruin your relationship by letting them know how you feel; you will damage it more through discomfort and self-consciousness. Tell them how the news has so upended your understanding of them that you still don't know what to think about it. Perhaps it would help if your mother told you more about her early life—not the ins and outs of her oeuvre, but how she ended up in the business and how she managed to leave. It actually is an inspiring story. Pornography usually doesn't attract happy people, but somehow your mother realized this was a destructive life, and she built a solid new one. Since Sunday is Mother's Day, begin reconnecting by calling and telling her that you appreciate how hard it must have been to share her past, but that it is past. Let her know what matters is what a great mother she's been and that you look forward to having a whole summer to spend with her.

—Prudie

Dear Prudence Video: She's Not a Teen Mother

Dear Prudence,
I'm about to graduate from college with a degree in history and political science. I'm planning on going to graduate school and, considering my interests, I know that Washington, D.C., would provide the best opportunities for both school and a potential career. However, my mother, who lives in Connecticut, was recently diagnosed with a recurrence of breast cancer, which has metastasized to her bones and will require weekly chemotherapy treatments for the rest of her life. Right now she's stable, but I have no idea what the future holds. I would feel extremely guilty starting a new life so far away and leaving her behind. I know that she wants me to "follow my dreams," but deep down I think she really would like me close to home. Do I do what's best for my career, or do I put it all on hold?

—Guilt Ridden

Dear Guilt,
I'm sorry for this sad news; I hope your mother's treatments give her many good years. As with the letter writer above, the key to making your decision is actually talking this out with your mother. Of course both of you are going to have mixed feelings, whatever your decision. So sit down with her and say there's no perfect answer here. Tell her you won't leave her to make the final decision, but you want to hear her true feelings and not just infer them. There are some mothers who would insist a daughter follow her desire, wherever it takes her, and some who would want to be as close as possible for whatever time is left. Also consider that you may be seeing this decision more starkly than it actually is. Washington is not all that far from Connecticut. True, you couldn't see her weekly, but you could go home frequently. And not being in Washington doesn't mean putting your career on hold. Look into all the graduate programs nearby. Even going to Boston or New York—which would be an easy car or train ride away—might be a way to pursue your dreams while being closer to home.