Prudie counsels a woman whose practical-joker hubby won't stop yanking down her trousers—and other advice-seekers.

Emily Yoffe: Good afternoon, everyone. For those in the D.C. area, I hope you got to see the cherry blossoms this weekend.

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Pensacola, Fla.: I know this sounds stupid and petty. I have a great husband and love him more than anything—but he does something that ends up causing a fight every time. He thinks it's hilarious to pull my pants down, for instance, when I am doing dishes or just getting up off the couch. It's constant, and I find it annoying and unfunny. When I ask him to stop, he gets pouty and says I am not playful, and it's "not like it's in public." Well, I don't care—I think it's weird, and I hate it. How can I get this to stop without causing a fight?

Emily Yoffe: I disagree that this sounds petty and stupid. This sounds bizarre and awful. I always wonder in cases like yours whether, as you were dating, you thought, "This is the man of my dreams! There is that little problem with him abusively pulling down my pants all the time and pouting when I tell him how much I hate it. I wonder how mauve and peach would look as my wedding colors?" If this is not a new behavior, why did you marry this guy? If it is a new behavior, then he has some disturbing ideas of what's allowable behavior. You say he does this constantly and ignores your pleas to stop. Next time he does it, without a word pull up your pants and walk out the door, and go stay at a friend's house. You can call him later and tell him both that this has to stop and that you also want to go to a marriage counselor to figure out some rules for making your marriage work. It's possible he will actually get the message. It's also possible this is his opening gambit for a life of constant humiliation.

Dear Prudence Video: My Boss Can't Spell!

St. Louis, Mo.: My mother died a few months ago, and yesterday I went to her cousin's house for Easter dinner. I feel such a disconnect now. When is it OK to quit these things?

Emily Yoffe: I'm sorry for your loss. I'm trying to understand if you mean now that your mother's dead you see this as an opportunity to bow out of the whole business of having a family, or if you have always loathed these cousins and you feel liberated to make other Easter plans. If it's the former, unless there's something wrong with your extended family, I would think that you would want to maintain connections and be glad that you were included in their dinner. And if your gripe with the cousins is that they are dull, for example, I would even say dinner once a year seems like a good investment to make in staying in touch with people who meant so much to your mother.

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Confused in Connecticut: I'm 30 years old and have been married for just over a year. My husband is a year older than me, and I guess we're at the point in our lives where our friends start having children. I went to visit one of these friends and her newborn son this weekend, and as I left, my husband commented that he hoped the baby cried, so that "you won't want one." I asked him about this comment when I got home, as (I thought) I had always been quite clear that having children was important to me. He replied that he thought he could have a happy and fulfilled life with or without children but that he knew it was important to me. To me, this is not the same as saying, "Yes, I want to be a father someday." Am I wrong to feel betrayed by this? We dated for SIX years before we got married—six years in which the topic of children came up numerous times. I even went through one of those pre-wedding checklists with him which discussed things like the type of values we'd want our children to have and how we'd divide the burden of child-rearing. Now I feel like he was just agreeing with me. I love him, but I'm seriously shaken by this. I don't want to have children with someone who doesn't also really want them.

Emily Yoffe: Your husband didn't say he's changed his mind and didn't want children. He's just looking at his easy, happy, fulfilled life with you and thinking, "This seems pretty good. Why throw a small, squalling creature into the mix?" While some people of both sexes have a burning desire to have children, others are at best neutral—until they have their own child. (I'm one of them.) I don't think you should feel betrayed or that worried. Your husband was being honest with you, so engage him in a nondefensive way. Say you understand that for some people visiting new babies can be a detour to having your own baby, and you appreciate that he can express his concerns. You can even say that as much as you want children, it's hard for you to imagine it, too. Don't make more of his musings than they warrant.

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Chatty Cathy: We recently moved to the 'burbs and have a house with a nice fenced backyard. We (especially the kid and the dog) are really enjoying it. Our only problem is our one next-door neighbor. She is in her 60s and lives with her 92-year-old mother. Whenever we are outside, even if it's just the dog running around, she comes out. She'll have treats for the dog or chat with my son or husband and I. It's making me enjoy the yard less and less. I can't let the dog out for a quick pee, and my son comes in every time talking about "Sue." I wanted to sit outside to read in the gorgeous weather this weekend but had to make an excuse after a half-hour conversation to go inside. She seems lonely, and I don't want to be rude. But I don't know what to do.

Emily Yoffe: She is lonely, which is sad, but she has no compunction about being rude, which is rude. However, you want to have pleasant, though limited relations with the neighbor with logorrhea. Invite her over for brunch one weekend. Explain you've never really had a chance to have a proper conversation—when all of you are in the yard you're busy with your own activities—and you wanted to introduce yourselves. Then having done that, when she next leans over the fence you can say, "Oh, Sue, nice to see you. I'm grabbing a chance to catch up on my reading, but we'll chat another time" and turn to your book. Or, "I'm sorry, I'm such a bad multitasker, and I really have to concentrate on not letting the dog tear up the yard," then clam up. You have to train Sue now that you will speak only when it suits you, or else your yard will become a permanent conversation pit.

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Los Angeles, Calif.: My parents, who are in their 70s and in good health, have never discussed money matters with me. Ever. They live in a house in a wealthy area and have never lacked for money as far as I can see—vacations, restaurants, etc. They are currently planning a trip to Asia. However, in the next two decades they'll be growing ill and passing on, and I need to know the state of their finances so I can make plans for their care. They seem ashamed and scared to discuss this. I am financially stable and need nothing from them. I love my parents and want to do right by them, and I can't unless I know the real state of affairs. Ideas?

Emily Yoffe: It's a very good idea for grown children to be able to have a conversation with their elderly parents about their long-term plans and wishes. I'm not sure, "I've looked at the actuarial tables and the next couple of decades will be a period of decline and death for you guys—so how are you planning to pay for that?" is the right approach. Instead of this being an issue of shame and fear, you should approach the conversation by saying they are a model for you for graceful aging, and you want to be able to discuss their long-term wishes with them as the years go on. For now, approach this as information gathering. Say that just for the sake of an emergency, you want to have some basic information about what to do if something untoward happens. If they absolutely refuse to engage in this conversation, you will have to do it piecemeal as events dictate.

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