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Note: Prudie is so chastened by her lapse of judgment, leading to clearly rotten advice (in the Aug. 28 column regarding "Bride-To-Be," who wanted to ask for money instead of wedding gifts), that she will temporarily abandon the usual third-person form of address and express regret directly from Prudie's overseer.

I have not laid such an egg since the handicapped toilet imbroglio. For whatever reason, I was trying to be understanding and to validate the underlying logic of the future bride's argument. I do know, and have always known, that requests for cash at weddings are anathema to good taste and accepted etiquette. Readers tried to cushion the blow, however, by prefacing their messages with such remarks as: "I usually love and agree with your advice, but ..." "Your advice is usually terrific and delivered with wonderful zest, but ..." These kind phrases were followed by "No, Prudie! NOOOOO!!!!" "I cannot believe you are actually ADVOCATING people asking for cash in their WEDDING INVITATIONS." "A wedding is not a gift grab." "I have never written to an advice columnist before this, but your answer to "Bride-To-Be" was so terrible I had to comment." "This is nothing more than the woman shaking down her wedding guests for cash!" The word "tacky" appeared with some regularity.

There were also, you should know, letters from members of the Soprano family, so to speak, who complained that gifts of money are part of their tradition and they have never been comfortable with that custom being considered improper. Regionalism figured in, as well:

In this part of the country (downstate NY), cash gifts are the norm rather than the exception. I don't ever remember it not being this way. (I'm in my early 40s, so I've been to my share of weddings.) So maybe the rest of the country doesn't know that they're missing!

Because this is not an etiquette column, and I obviously am inclined toward making new protocols, there will be no more etiquette questions. We will return to infidelity, Internet porn, miserable mothers-in-law, hellish bosses, and jailbird boyfriends. Now back to business.

—Prudie, contritely

Dear Pru,

I've recently married and started attending my wife's church. As a regular at my church, formal dress (suit and tie) was the norm for me. Meanwhile, at my wife's church, it is casual dress (khakis and knits). I'm not a stick in the mud; however, I become tired of seeing people wearing clothes two sizes too big just barely hanging onto their rear ends. I think there should be a certain degree of honor and respect displayed at church. I am not interested in compromising. What say you?

—Sunday's Child

Dear Sun,

Prudie will answer your question with one of her own: Who, exactly, do you suggest tell these people that certain parishioners are tired of seeing them in clothes "just barely hanging onto their rear ends"? The minister, perhaps? You? Prudie thinks that you should, by all means, wear a suit and tie to services if you feel it shows respect. And when you're praying, you might ask the good Lord to forgive those with no fashion sense who come into His house.