Please send your questions for publication to prudence@slate.com.

Dear Prudie,

I'm at loggerheads with all my close girlfriends. I am a few years out of college and have a wonderful job with real possibilities for advancement. The bone of contention is my boyfriend. Everyone is saying, "Run!" but I am absolutely crazy about him. I will be perfectly honest with you: He's gorgeous and great in the sack. What everybody is worried about is that he doesn't have much ambition and goes from one job to the next ... and these "positions" are not at a very good level. He kind of knows that my friends don't like this romance, but he tells me he's sure, in time, that he'll mature into a responsible adult. I would be interested in how my situation looks to an outsider.

—Pulled and Torn

Dear Pull,

Prudie would feel more hopeful about your relationship if the young man's attributes included more than good looks and sexual skills. Ambition and maturity are not going to materialize just because the calendar advances. What Prudie thinks you need to remember is that an erection is not a sign of personal growth. Bail out, honey. It has been pretty much proved that when one's inner circle agrees that a guy is bad news, that is exactly what he is.

—Prudie, maturely

Dear Prudence,

My mother died in 1989, my father remarried a year later, and for the last 10 years he has given me nothing but heartache. At 16, he told me to leave after my stepmother told him how much she disliked me. Several months later he told my younger brother to see if he couldn't find a place to stay. My brother was 12 years old and managed to stay with friends until an aunt and uncle took him in. Several months after that, my little sister, who was 8, was sent to live with an aunt and uncle in a different state. Since then my siblings and I have done everything we can, short of hitting him on the head with a 2-by-4, to get him to acknowledge our existence. Finally, for my own peace of mind, I gave up and got on with my life rather than harbor so much unhealthy anger.

I am now 26 and will be marrying an absolutely wonderful man in September. I am happy, have two good jobs, live in a great area, and have fantastic friends. My question to you is: What do I do about inviting my [dad] to the wedding? I don't particularly want to, but I know that if he finds out I got married without telling him, he will be furious. What do you suggest I do?