Please send your questions for publication to prudence@slate.com.

Dear Prudence,

I'm a grad student at a large research university in the Midwest. A cutie from Germany--also a grad student, in another department--caught my eye this past year, and I am positively smitten. Although I've made my affections for her very clear, she has turned me down for dates because she prefers the company of her "Euroclique," a group of grad students also from "The Continent." Frankly, I find most of them annoying and downright dorky. Thus, it seems clear that my Midwestern roots turn her off. What can I do to win this girl's affections?

--R.S.

Dear R.,

Tell her your grandfather was Kaiser Wilhelm? Only kidding. As a fellow Midwesterner, Prudie feels special kinship with you. The thing you must do in a situation like this is accept that people's attractions are hardwired. (Have you noticed how often the second spouse resembles the first?) There is a slim chance that this young woman is just not interested in you (with no consideration of nationality involved) and is trying to let you down gently. Prudie's rule is an old retailing maxim: Your first markdown is your cheapest. Do not wait around for this girl to change her mind. Just accept things as they are and cast your eye elsewhere. Prudie bets you a euro you will find another woman about whom you will be smitten.

--Prudie, romantically

Dear Prudence,

I was raised in a family where we were never big gift-givers. On special days we each give a meaningful gift and mainly focus on having a nice meal or an outing together. My husband's family, on the other hand, sees Christmas and birthdays as occasions for major asset transfers. In other words, they are more into dollar value than my family. (My dear husband was horrified last Christmas with my family when all he got was a shirt and tie.) I worry that my husband's family does not see our carefully chosen gifts as the sincere expression of love and affection that they are. Sometimes I feel trapped in a Polynesian cycle of humiliation by gift giving. Any tips?

--Yours humbly,