Please send your questions for publication to prudence@slate.com.

Dear Prudence,

Your recent column about handicapped restroom stall etiquette emboldens me to ask perhaps a rude question. Is it bad manners for a guest to excuse himself from the dinner table, go to the small bathroom off the dining room, and attempt to participate in the conversation? Our friend Jacob does just that. Do you think he should wander upstairs, and if not, at least be silent?

--Just Wondering

Dear Just,

Prudie, too, hates to miss a minute of good dinner party talk, but your friend Jacob goes too far. Hollering from the loo is not acceptable. When you issue the next invitation, tell him you'd like it if he would take a timeout from the badinage when he needs to leave the table. Tell him it's a little idiosyncrasy of yours that you think people conversing at the table should ... be at the table.

--Prudie, conversationally

Dear Prudence,

My matron of honor is unexpectedly moving away. She is a good friend, and I will be sorry to see her leave. Now I need to ask another person to be in the wedding, which is two months away. The person I want to ask is actually my best friend, and she lives in another state. She already knows that I had asked someone else to stand up for me, so my question is: How do I now ask her to be my matron of honor? She is really the person I wanted anyway--she just lives far away.

Help!