Having the sex talk while your husband is deployed.

Notes from a military wife.
April 9 2010 11:08 AM

Well, the Boy Guinea Pig Gets on the Girl and Then …

Having the sex talk while your husband is deployed.

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Estee resumed playing with her toys. She seemed completely uninterested. But Ethan was stunned, speechless. He asked me to repeat it, so I did.

"You and Dad had to do that TWO TIMES?" he yelled.


"That's how babies get made," I repeated, trying to shift the conversation from the specific to the general.

"Aren't you embarrassed?" he asked.

"When a man and a woman love each other, it's what they do, and there's nothing to be embarrassed about," I said. He calmed down. The conversation smoothed out. I was starting to feel like SuperSingleMom, able to leap unexpected questions in a single explanation. After all, I had tackled the topic of gay relationships the previous week, prompted by front-page photos in the Washington Post of men kissing men. (D.C. recently legalized same-sex marriage.) That went well, too.

"Mom, can I do it to you?" Ethan suddenly asked.

"No," I said, horrified.

"Can I do it to Estee?"


"But I love you."