What would you take to a desert isle,
my teacher wanted to know
I told her my Bible. That made her smile.
A copy of Robinson Crusoe!
She liked that one too. I mentioned my dog.
And pictures of Grandma and Grandpa.
She wept. Her glasses started to fog
and a tear ran into her bra.
I mentioned my schoolbooks, and gave her a grin.
She looked at me and squinted.
She wanted the truth? Two bottles of gin
and every Playboy ever printed.
TODAY IN SLATE
Blacks Don’t Have a Corporal Punishment Problem
Americans do. But when blacks exhibit the same behaviors as others, it becomes part of a greater black pathology.
I Bought the Huge iPhone. I’m Already Thinking of Returning It.
Scotland Is Just the Beginning. Expect More Political Earthquakes in Europe.
Lifetime Didn’t Think the Steubenville Rape Case Was Dramatic Enough
So they added a little self-immolation.
Two Damn Good, Very Different Movies About Soldiers Returning From War
The Most Terrifying Thing About Ebola
The disease threatens humanity by preying on humanity.